As Archie Williams students come out of hibernation, the motivation to become the best version of themselves rears its head for the new year. These self-proclaimed acts of bettering oneself can vary from physical and mental to academic goals. Rest assured that almost all of them will degenerate within the first four weeks of 2025. Nevertheless, a resolution is a resolution, no matter how ridiculous it is, so let’s take a look at the most popular promises people break to themselves year after year.
Joining a gym
This resolution is by far the most popular and least executed out of them all. The wish to improve one’s physique through treadmill running or weightlifting is appealing to the average teenager with body dysmorphia and the goal to look like Dwyane “the Rock” Johnson or a Victoria’s Secret supermodel. Unfortunately, factors such as paying for a gym membership, having a means of transportation, and sticking to a routine that will produce actual change are usually beyond a student’s capability. To be clear, there is nothing wrong with joining the gym to improve physical and mental health, but lower your expectations: you’re not going to wake up with a 12-pack after breathing in the gym air.
Saving money
To be honest, this is a good resolution, it just never works out. Take one step in a Target and it’s already out the window. The feeling of receiving your first paycheck, getting a weekly allowance, or going home from a job with a pocket full of cash is like no other, and the urge to spend it on the new hot item is strong. Saving money in high school, especially when living in a wealthy area like Marin, is difficult when you’re surrounded by over-consumption. All it takes is one shopping trip with some friends, or an influencer promoting a jacket, and suddenly, your bank account is 20 pounds lighter. Nobody becomes a millionaire from saving $2 after spending $50, and there is no exception.
Reducing screen time
Whether this resolution is for your mental health by staying away from harmful social media or because your parents keep nagging you to get off your phone, it will ultimately fail regardless of the screen time limits you put on Instagram or TikTok. These limits are easily avoidable with the app’s “five more minutes” button, and it inevitably spins into five more hours. The attempt to pick up other hobbies like reading will make you feel old and bored if it’s one of the classics. Social media is like a toxic ex-boyfriend; if you want to be independent from its grasp, you need to cut it out completely, or else you’ll come desperately crawling back.
Staying organized
Hoarders, this one’s for you. It’s hard to clean out or get rid of stuff with sentimental value, even if it hasn’t seen the light of day since 2017. When laundry day comes and the pile of clothes stares menacingly at you from the ground, it’s so much easier to kick it under the bed than spend 15 minutes putting everything away. Two months deep into the new year, and your bedroom will once again look like a warzone. It’s inevitable. Good hygiene is a useful life skill, but you don’t need your room to resemble a hotel.
Improving grades
The two-week winter break is the perfect time for students to forget how soul-crushing and time-consuming studying for straight A’s can be. It allows people to entertain the idea that they can become an academic weapon for the second semester. This type of confidence is usually exhibited by freshmen, who have yet to experience the horror of AP class testing. Unfortunately, this reality will soon be shattered once students realize that buying new school supplies or updating their Pinterest board with photos of straight A’s will not fix their chronic procrastination problems.
Sleep schedule
Humans are creatures of habit. Some habits are hard to break, especially when they concern staying up until 1 a.m. watching cats play the piano. When winter break rolls around, all concept of time is lost, as students can stay up and sleep in as much as they please. Technically speaking, sleeping from 3 a.m. to 11 a.m. is still a full eight hours of sleep… right? And when the break ends, surely it will be easy to return to 9 p.m. to 6 a.m.…right? Wrong. Sleep schedules don’t change overnight. Stop reaching for that melatonin and find a resolution you can stick to, or put your phone somewhere else when you sleep to suppress the urge to grab it.
Learn a new hobby
Picking up a new hobby is good in theory until you realize it actually requires time and work. Being automatically good at everything is a skill no one has and no one ever will. Musical instruments are exhausting to learn: reading music, cramping fingers, the list goes on. Art is messy and is not therapeutic, no matter what anyone says. Learning a new sport? Forget it. Learning new hobbies is more challenging than it looks in movies. Trust me, I speak from experience.
Staying positive
Sure! Why not, until you get an F on a test you studied hard for, you lose an important game, get horribly sick, get in a fight with someone you love, or stub a toe. Not only is this unrealistic, it’s incredibly toxic for your mental health. Excessive positivity can lead to ignoring real-life problems and functions as an avoidance mechanism. It minimizes and ignores painful feelings, invalidates real experiences, and often, you’re just setting yourself up for failure. Rather than chasing the “positivity mindset,” focus on the moment and bask in it. Stay true to yourself instead.
Upgrading to “couple” status
If getting into a relationship is on your bucket list for 2025, you are doomed to fail. The problem with relationships is that they need to come naturally; they can’t be forced into existence by sheer will or manifestation. Making that daily 0.8 seconds of eye contact with a hallway crush doesn’t count, nor will they suddenly ask you out after seeing you walking with your backpack wide open. Your best chance at getting into a relationship is waiting until the right person who accepts you comes around, but until then, stop pining over people who don’t want you. The truth is harsh.
The new year will surely bring joy and happiness to people all around, as it usually is a time to celebrate new beginnings and send off the year behind us. Resolutions, although inspiring and exciting when writing them down, usually end in failure. So when 2025 rolls around, don’t take yourself too seriously January 1. You haven’t changed all that much from the previous year, which was only 24 hours ago.
